Fangirl

I have delved into the dark realm of fanfiction precisely twice. The first time was satisfactory: I read a short, tasteful story that wrapped up some loose ends in the original work. The second time, however, was ... how shall I put this ... terrifying, horrifying, petrifying, and awful. It included descriptions like "ebony-haired companion" and "the flames of trauma flickered in his deep blue eyes." I swiftly swore off fanfic for life and decided that all of it was awful, no matter what.

This was partially because of my bad experience, but also because of the - mostly undeserved - bad reputation that fanfiction has garnered. On the internet, anything goes, so a two-page alternate ending to a popular movie can find its home right alongside a three-thousand-page, vaguely pornographic tome featuring Hermione Granger and the giant squid.

Then, too, fanfiction has effectively been relegated to the dark corners of the internet, banished to obsessively-updated tumblrs and sub-sub-sub-reddits. And, of course, 50 Shades of Gray.

A fangirl, though - that's something slightly more accessible. According to urbandictionary, a fangirl is "a rabid breed of human female who is obsessed with either a fictional character or an actor." Fangirls have been around for decades - the Beatles' fan base was primarily made of fangirls, and actors have had fangirls since the beginning of time.

Although fangirl began as a derogatory term for a screaming boy-band fanatic, it has grown to encompass, well, pretty much everybody on the internet. We all have that one thing that we obsess over, think about in our spare time, watch endless gifs of, drool over, dream about ... or at least something that we're mildly invested in.

Often, fangirls and fanfiction go hand in hand. Really, it's the logical next step - if you're interested in something enough to label yourself a fangirl, you probably feel pretty strongly about it and have a general idea of how you'd like it to turn out, or a favorite part you'd like to commemorate, whether it's from a novel or a web series or a TV show or a band. Your interest can then lead you to create an alternate version of the story, or to tell the same events from a different perspective, or to continue the story after its official conclusion.

Rainbow Rowell (author of Eleanor & Park), wrote Fangirl, one of the first novels to focus on - or even mention - fanfiction.

Fanfiction itself isn't a new phenomenon - stories have been retold and rewritten for centuries (for instance, Romeo and Juliet is a slightly altered version of an old folk tale), and authors naturally draw inspiration from other works when creating their own. Fanfiction was only really popularized, however, after the Star Trek fan community began publishing fanfictions in their fanzines in the the 60s, and since then it has been slowly gaining acceptance and approval. Now it's rare to find a TV show, book, or youtube channel that doesn't have entire websites devoted to its fanfiction.

In my opinion, fanfiction itself isn't bad. Writing is, of course, a way to express yourself, and if the best way to do that is to write about characters or people that already exist, I don't really see anything wrong. Like anything on the internet, however, fanfiction has a dark side, which is usually what's focused on when discussing it: it uses characters that someone else has created, it can infringe on copyright, and sometimes it's just downright creepy. If you write fanfiction, all you need to do is upload it to a blog or website and then anyone can read it, so there's no quality control or guarantee that it will be well-written or true to the original book or show. (So if you're going to venture into the world of fanfiction, just be careful!)

Fangirl does a great job exploring how perceptions of fanfiction can differ. The main character, Cath is a painfully introverted girl who - unwillingly - is starting college. She and her twin sister, Wren, have been close their whole lives, and shared an obsession of Simon Snow (the most popular book series in her world - basically a combination of Twilight, Harry Potter, and Magyk). Together, they began writing and publishing fanfiction, and though Wren grew away from the community, Cath is still just as heavily invested, and now has thousands of followers eagerly awaiting every new post. This year, however, Wren wants to set off on her own. She gets a dorm across campus, signs up for all new classes, and parties every night, while Cath huddles over her computer to write the next installment of her Simon Snow fanfiction.

Cath's literature professor hates it, condemning it as plagiarism, other people at her college look down on it as nerdy or pointless, while Cath herself - and her thousands of online followers - sees it as an artistic means of self-expression, satisfying both her need to create her own stories and her need to read someone else's. 

Along with the pressure to finish her fic before the eight and final Simon Snow book is released, the absence of her sister, the stress of her new classes and her paralyzing awkwardness (for example, she ate only protein bars for over a month because she didn't want to ask anyone where the dining hall was), Cath also must deal with her surly and intimidating roommate, Reagan, and Reagan's sort-of-boyfriend Levi who's always hanging around.

Reagan was probably my favorite character in this book: she was tough and had a strong personality and didn't really care what anyone thought of her. Although at first she seemed almost mean, her unapologetic, take-it-or-leave-it stance on life made her a more of a likeable character than anyone else.

Levi seemed like a dream boy at first: he was relaxed and laid-back, and from the beginning he seemed almost ridiculously kind. He did his best to make sure that everyone was happy and comfortable, and went out of his way to brighten the day of anyone who crossed his path.

He and Cath slowly grew together, and became good friends before he finally kissed her. This marked the first time Cath has ever kissed anyone who meant something to her - so when she goes to her first party the next night and sees Levi kissing another girl, she's heartbroken.

Her reaction, however, seemed way too strong for what is really such a minor event. She completely stopped speaking to him, refused to even look at him, and avoided him for weeks. Cath and Levi hadn't even been together at the time, but she still viewed it as a complete betrayal.

Even when they finally worked through their difficulties and began dating, her concern remained. Throughout the rest of the book she kept referring to the incident, and it took Levi an unbelievably long time to gain back her trust. Although the slow, careful romance in Eleanor & Park was believable and endearing, Cath and Levi's romance seemed overly drawn out, unrealistic, and even prudish. They dated for months before Cath so much as held Levi's hand, let alone kissed him - and though the expectation is what kept me reading Eleanor & Park, this book seemed to drag out the shy-early-couple stages to the breaking point.

Despite this, I still couldn't put the book down. Rainbow is an incredible writer, and her portrayal of insecurity and awkwardness was completely realistic (and kind of terrifying). Even though I know that Cath is an extreme case, and I at least posses the social skills necessary to ask for food and water, as I began this book I was still crippled by the fear that my college experience would be similar. However, Rainbow carefully develops Cath from a painfully shy, miserable freshman to a slightly less shy, happier sophomore - not a Disney makeover by any means, but a realistic look at a college student's first experiences in the world.

Fangirl certainly wasn't as flawless as Eleanor & Park but the characters, plot, and excellent writing all contrived to make it a great book, and as one of the few novels that actively encourages fanfiction while still promoting original creativity, it's definitely worth reading.

-Maya